Don’t Expect What You Can’t Give

Dearest Next Generation,

I have been absent as of late and I apologize for that. I really have no valid excuses.

I hope you have been well and prosperous as I expect you are. I wanted to share something that might taste bitter at first but knowing you, understanding will come.

I’ll jump right to the point for you. This thing is called respect.

I know that you have dealt with it so I just wanted to give a little insight to help you on your way.

In your experiences with respect you have seen that it’s bidirectional. Meaning that respect can be given as well as received.

Have you ever thought about what qualifies receiving versus giving?

This is what I wanted to share with you. Giving respect as well as receiving it is equally hard. This is not your usual Christmas gift. In some cultures, this is giving a bow as another receives it.

In your culture, respect is demanded from certain people regardless of proof of deserving it. With other people you make a decision to give respect based on their actions. In most cases, this is the best practice.

When giving respect, you are stepping aside and allowing the receiver to either give some back by acknowledging your gift or ignoring your sacrifice.

This brings up the opposite side of respect. Receiving it.

How an individual handles this selfless gift defines them. It can foster more respect or diminish the reason to give it in the first place.

The bitter pill that I mentioned in the beginning of this letter is when and how you should expect to be the receiver of respect.

Those that you showed respect to and stomped on your gift may never get your selflessness again.

Being a receiver of respect comes with high responsibility. Would you like to foster it so that people regularly show respect to you?

The biggest mistake made by people expecting respect is in timing. They may demand it because they accomplished something while thinking no one else could have done it. So they expect respect.

Expecting respect will always lead to disappointment. Others might not see the need to give respect for your accomplishments while you feel they should.

Receiving it unexpectedly, not by mistake but because you accomplished something that the giver of respect, sees as reason to give it, is most rewarding.

Respect can never be demanded without diminishing its value.

Being humble towards the giver fosters more respect. It assures the giver that they have made a good decision in placing their respect with you.

In your endeavors, some of you will become great leaders. The secret to staying a great leader is in the above text.

Until next time Dear Next Generation, Do try new things safely for you and your generation.